Restore the Guardrails of Sex - Self-control
Oct 25, 2018
For 18 years now, Connections has been working on the issue of childhood sex abuse. Along with helping victims heal from the trauma, it has been our heartbeat to do some primary prevention and work to stop sex abuse.
I, Rebecca, have been doing some research about how the culture views sex. I discovered some alarming information about how the feminist movement and sexual revolution set behaviors in motion that have ultimately been hurtful and diminished the sacredness of sex.
As a result, we have identified some core thoughts that if reinstated, would shift the culture. To that end we are starting with this guardrail:
- Restore self-control, dignity and respect
The current culture is such that sex is treated as an entitlement and expectation in dating or “hooking up.” People have downplayed the consequences of this disregard for the sexual act.
"Students of both sexes, according to Wade, felt pressured into having sex, but more women than men said that they had engaged in sex they did not desire, eve in the absence of coercion, threats, or incapacitation, because they felt it was their only option.
Students find hooking up so uncomfortable, so odd, so dehumanizing that they use alcohol to dull their senses." Sex Matters by Mona Charen
How important it is to restore self-control, and treat the sexual experience, and the person with dignity and respect.
Self-control is the act of denying yourself something in the moment. We use this skill when shopping, when eating; actually in many scenarios in life. It's the combination of knowing you may desire something, but make a conscious choice to not respond to that desire.
Because sex is currently fogged by the concepts of "free love", it's just a physical act, and it's a goal to achieve, among other beliefs, the using self control has been lost. It is absolutely possible to tell yourself, "not now." And it is absolutely necessary to do just that as we restore the safety around sex.